Posts tagged Giselle Eisenberg
Sex Tape “As Promised”
Jul 29th
SEX TAPE is a movie that resembles its title: lots of skin and boring story.
Now, be honest: Have you ever watched a “porno” that had a good story? The answer has got to be “no,” because the whole point of a porno is to see the naked bodies and the acts of copulation themselves.
In other words, if you want a story, read a good book.
If you want to see the naked bodies of Cameron Diaz and Jason Segel pretending to have sex, recording it for their own amusement, and then spending the rest of the movie trying to recover all the copies that accidentally got released up into the “Cloud,” then go ahead and see this movie, but prepare to be as bored as anyone is who actually watches a porno film.
Incidentally, the truest line in the movie and perhaps even the funniest is when Jay says to Annie, “Nobody understands the Cloud!” in his frustration when he can’t easily retrieve the copies that have been sent there.
However, most of the movie consists of their attempts to obtain the tablets that they gave to people, not realizing that a copy of their video is on each tablet.
One of those tablets was given to Hank, played by Rob Lowe, who might become Annie’s new boss, and they show up late at night at Hank’s front door, pretending to be collecting money for a charity, and the plan is for Annie to distract Hank while Jay goes searching through Hank’s house looking for the tablet.
Remember that tired old line, “That was so funny, I forgot to laugh,” which is said after a joke or a situation that wasn’t funny? That applies to this subplot, too.
There is another subplot involving somebody texting Jay who claims to have a copy of the video and threatens to blackmail Jay for $25,000 or else the video will go public.
Now, I can’t prove the reason for this, but are you as surprised as I am whenever a relatively known actor in a relatively important part in a movie doesn’t get listed in the credits?
Such is the case here with the actor sho plays the owner of a porn site who tells Jay and Annie, “There’s no shortage of sex tapes.”
SEX TAPE proves that.
I’m Dan Culberson and this is “Hotshots.”
Sex Tape – Movie Trailer
Jul 21st
Jay (Jason Segel) and Annie (Cameron Diaz) are a married couple still very much in love, but ten years and two kids have cooled the passion. To get it back, they decide – why not? – to make a video of themselves trying out every position in THE JOY OF SEX in one marathon three-hour session. It seems like a great idea, until they discover that their most private video has gone public. In a panic, they begin a wild night of adventure – tracking down leads, roping in friends, duping Annie’s boss – all to reclaim their video, their reputation, their sanity, and, most importantly, their marriage.
“The Wolf of Wall Street” an Exercise in Excessive Excess
Jan 13th
“Exercise in Excessive Excess”
“Hotshots” looks at a movie!
The Wolf of Wall Street was directed by Martin Scorsese and stars Leonardo DiCaprio based on a 2007 memoir of the same name written by Jordan Belfort.
DiCaprio plays Belfort himself.
Right at the beginning of the movie Jordan says, “I always wanted to be rich,” and we see him at the start of his career as a licensed stockbroker for a big firm on Wall Street.
Matthew McConaughey plays his mentor at the firm, and he tells Jordan, “The name of the game is to move the money from your clients’ pockets into your pocket.”
Unfortunately, Jordan’s first day as a broker was October 19, 1987, the biggest plummet of the stock market since the 1929 crash, and Jordan was out of a job before he even got started.
Jordan believes that Wall Street swallowed him up, but he finds a job with a tiny firm that sells penny stocks and is surprised to learn that he receives a 50% commission on his sales whereas his previous job would have paid him only 1%.
So, Jordan is selling garbage to garbagemen, as he puts it, and he begins making money hand over fist, so much so that one day in a restaurant he attracts the attention of Donnie Azoff, played by Jonah Hill, and Donnie tells Jordan that if Jordan can prove how much money he is making, Donnie will quit his job right there over the phone and come work for Jordan.
Donnie does, they start their own company with some misfit salesmen, and Jordan teaches them how to sell penny stocks to rich people.
The firm becomes highly successful from practices that are not always entirely legal, Jordan meets and marries a beautiful woman named Naomi, and drugs, wild parties, prostitutes, and naked women become a large part of everyone’s lives in and away from the firm.
And, of course, they attract the attention of the FBI, which starts investigating Jordan, Donnie, and their brokerage firm.
So, the merry band of brokers go through the intricate and illegal process of moving their money into Swiss bank accounts, but of course everything doesn’t go according to plan.
Nothing ever does in the movies, does it?
The Wolf of Wall Street might be too rough for many people’s taste and is just an exercise in excessive excess.
I’m Dan Culberson and this is “Hotshots.”
