Posts tagged Santa
Trust in Santa Claus: Naked Curmudgen by Dan Culberson
Dec 2nd
Here’s what gets me.
Trust in God is no more realistic and rewarding than trust in Santa Claus.
After all, the concept of God and believing in God’s existence is merely childhood fantasy grown up, because God is nothing more than Santa Claus for adults.
Think about it. Occasionally, some very old people will be singled out on television, and many times one of them is likely to say, “I attribute my long life to clean living, good health and trust in God.” If they are born-again Christians, they might say “trust in Jesus” instead, but think how substituting “Santa Claus” for either one makes absolutely no difference to the validity that the trust had anything to do with the person’s longevity and absolutely nothing to the validity of the existence of any of those named individuals.
Look at the similarities: Santa Claus, Mrs. Claus and all of Santa’s elves live up at the North Pole, and their only reason for being is to reward good little boys and girls one night a year by giving them presents. And when does Santa do this? On Christ’s birthday!
God, Jesus, the angels and every good person who has ever been rewarded with eternal life lives up in Heaven just waiting for new souls to come on up and live forever. And when does this happen? On each “saved” person’s death!
Depending on the religion or denomination, people are rewarded with an all-expenses-paid, free trip to Heaven for their good deeds on earth, for “accepting Jesus Christ as their savior” or merely for believing that God exists.
Santa Claus keeps a list, checks it twice and knows who has been naughty or nice in the past year, which he uses to reward those who have been “good” with presents and to punish those who have been “bad” with either no presents or a lump of coal in some cultures. And what do we associate coal with? Hot burning fire!
Have you ever known anyone who actually did receive only a lump of coal for Christmas, or is that just an empty threat that parents use to try to keep their children in line?
Santa Claus has lots of impersonators during the Christmas season standing on corners ringing their bells and collecting money and sitting in malls in order to let little children sit on their laps and tell them what they want for Christmas.
God has lots of churches throughout the year on practically every corner collecting money every Sunday or whenever a service is held and plenty of representations of either Jesus nailed to a cross or the Virgin Mary, Christ’s mother, God’s concubine, to which people can pray and tell them what special favor they would like.
This is where the Santa Claus myth is lacking. Astute creators and perpetuators of the myth should have thought to have given Santa a son so that Santa Jr. and Mrs. Claus could stand on corners and sit in malls to relieve some of the burden during the holidays, which, of course, comes from “holy days.”
Santa Claus uses the parents of the children to make them be good for their rewards, punish them as need be throughout the year, make empty promises about what they might get on Christmas morning and then make the actual purchases, hide them in closets, wrap them neatly and finally place them underneath the tree for the excited and eager children to find on Christmas morning.
God uses priests, preachers and other self-anointed representatives to “guide” the people, relay God’s words and intentions to them throughout the year, convey special requests if need be back up to God, make empty promises about what they might expect upon their deaths and then finally perform the memorial services for those people when they do die.
Trust in Santa Claus is expedient for parents to encourage their young children, because the promise of presents for good behavior and threats of no presents or that lump of coal for bad behavior is another tool in the parents’ bag of parenting tricks.
However, when children reach the age of about six, they should be clever enough to figure out on their own how all the contradictions and illogical details in the Santa Claus myth enable them to conclude that there is no Santa Claus and their parents have been misleading them all those years, even though their parents will claim that it was “for their own good.”
I rest my case.
Amen.
This weekend in St. Augustine, Ponte Vedra, and the beaches, November 30 – December 2
Nov 30th
British Nightwatch Opening Concert!
The Opening event for the Annual British Nightwatch Celebration, this concert showcasing traditional Celtic recording artists Father, Son and Friends, will take place at 8 p.m. at Francis Field on Castillo Drive behind the Parking Garage. Concert admission is $5, Children under 12 are free with a paying adult. www.britishnightwatch.org 904-829-5318
Keyhole After Dark Paranormal Event
2Ghouls Paranormal Events will provide a re-creation of a Victorian clandestine moment behind closed doors at the Hilton St. Augustine Historic Bayfront, 32 Avenida Menendez. The 2Ghouls program is about the bygone taboos of mystic parlor games: Tea-Leaf Reading, Pendulum Dowsing & the Talking Spirit Board. The fun begins at 7 p.m. Tickets are $25 per person. 904-671-5010
Friday and Saturday: November 30 & December 1
Candle Light Tours of Villa Zorayda
Explore the beautiful Villa Zorayda, decorated for the holiday season, featuring a Christmas tree in the “Court of Lions”, decorated in the Villa’s traditional red and gold, and a beautiful crèche nativity scene that that has been a Villa tradition since the 1930’s. Candles are aglow throughout the museum as the docent-led candlelight tour begins at 5:30 p.m. on Friday. Tickets are $14 for adults and $6 for Children. On Saturday, refreshments are served at 5:30 p.m. and the tour starts at 6 p.m. Tickets are $17 for adults and $8 for children 7 -12. Children 4 – 6 are free (not recommended for children under 3). Villa Zorayda is located at 83 King Street in St. Augustine. Reservations are suggested. www.villaZoryada.com 904.829.9887
Santa’s Village
Santa’s Village is open at 3 Cordova Street in St. Augustine. From 6 to 9 p.m. guests can visit with Santa, make a craft, enjoy hot cocoa, sing holiday karaoke, play reindeer games or enjoy a movie. Admission is $3, or FREE with the purchase of Red Train Sightseeing or Nights of Lights Tour. 904-824-1606
Friday, Saturday and Saturday: November 30, December 1 & 2
Festival of Trees at World Golf Village
A festive display of holiday trees and wreaths decorated by businesses, organizations, families and friends from the local community, all to benefit two local charities. Vote for your favorite tree for $1 per vote, or bid on one of the tress in the silent auction. Join Santa and Mrs. Claus and performers from the St. Augustine Ballet at the opening reception from 6 to 8 p.m. on Friday. The exhibit will be open daily 9 a.m. to 9 p.m. at the St. Johns County Convention Center, 500 S. Legacy Trail at the World Golf Village, through December 9. Admission is free! www.WorldGolfHallofFame.org
Viva Florida Art Exhibit
To commemorate the 500th Anniversary of Ponce de Leon’s discovery of La Florida, the St. Augustine Art Association Gallery celebrates the sights and structures, beaches and byways, flora and fauna, history and happenings that are uniquely Florida with a new exhibit. The St. Augustine Art Association Gallery, 22 Marine St., St. Augustine is open Tuesday through Saturday, noon to 4 p.m. and Sunday 2 to 5 p.m. Admission is Free. www.staaa.org
Winter Wonderland
The St. Augustine Amphitheater is transformed into a family-fun winter wonderland with ice skating, an ice slide, sleigh rides, an elf village and more. Open 5 to 10 p.m., Monday through Friday and 2 to 10 p.m. on Saturday and Sunday until December 21, then 2 p.m. to 10 p.m. daily through January 6. Admission is free and activities costs vary. The St. Augustine Amphitheater is located at 1340 A1A in St. Augustine. www.winterwonderlandflorida.com
Electric Bus Nights of Lights Tour
See the city lights on a 7-seat silent comfortable all-electric vehicle featuring a fully narrated 45 minute tour of St. Augustine’s lights and sights. Travelling down both the narrow and main streets, this tour goes where others do not! Nightly departures are from the parking lot behind Love Tree Café, 31 Orange Street, are on the hour from 6 to 9 p.m. Adult tickets are $12, Child under 12 are $10. 904-325-0547 www.staugustinegoldtours.com
Ripley’s Big Red Christmas Train
Ripley’s Big Red Christmas Train transports riders through St. Augustine’s magical Nights of Lights highlighting the sights and sounds of the season while viewing a magical holiday illusion through free magic viewing glasses. Nightly tours take place from 6 to 8 p.m. (till 9 p.m. on Friday and Saturday). Tickets are $8 for adults and $4 for children. On Friday and Saturday, tickets include admission to Santa’s Village. Tours start at Ripley’s Believe It or Not, 19 San Marco Avenue. 904-824-1606 www.RedTrains.com
Holly Jolly Holiday Tour
Explore St. Augustine’s famous Night of Lights in the cozy comfort of the Holly Jolly Trolleys. Caroling, hot cider, and homemade cookies add to the magic of your evening. Guests will receive complimentary magical viewing glasses, exclusively handcrafted by Santa’s elves. Tours depart regularly between 6 and 8 p.m. from the Visitors Information Center, 10 West Castillo Drive. Tickets are $9 for adults, and $4 for children ages 6 – 12. www.trolleytours.com.
Nights of Lights Wine and Carriage Tours
Step aboard an old-fashioned horse-drawn carriage and meander the historic streets on this 45 minute tour. While enjoying the spectacular light display, indulge in a bottle of delicious boutique wine (red or white). Tours depart from Isabella’s Cuban Bar, 19 Cuna Street, at 6, 7 and 8 p.m. on Friday and Saturday and at 6 p.m. on Sunday. Tickets are $46 per person – Adults only! 904-386-5482 www.thetastingtours.com
Saturday: December 1
58th Annual St. Augustine Christmas Parade
St. Augustine’s Christmas Parade has grown to be one of the largest parades in north Florida and includes floats, marching bands cars, horses, and the arrival of Santa. The parade will start promptly at 10 a.m. by the Mission of Nombre de Dios on San Marco Avenue; continue through the downtown streets of historic St. Augustine and end behind the Visitors Center on Castillo Dr. 904.824.4997
Pal Day
Military service personnel and families enjoy a free day at many of the St. Augustine attractions Please bring your military ID. A free lunch will be provided at The St. Augustine Elks Lodge, 1420 A1A S.on Anastasia Island. 904-471-2829
British Nightwatch Encampment
For a brief time, 1763 to 1783, St. Augustine was under British rule. During this holiday parade, loyal citizens are invited to join in, bearing candles or lanterns to light their way. Gather in the Plaza de la Constitucion at 7 p.m. The parade starts at 8 bells from the St. Augustine Government House circling Plaza then proceeds down St. George Street to the St. Augustine to the City Gates. Participation is free. For more information, visit www.BritishNightwatch.org 904-829-5318
Surf Illumination
Surf Illumination, the official seasonal lighting of St. Augustine Beach takes place from 4 to 7 p.m. at the Beach Pier Park, 350 A1A Beach Boulevard. The celebration includes the ceremonial lighting of the seasonal tree by the Mayor. Santa, musical performers, traditional carolers are all part of the fun-filled evening. Admission is free! Food and beverages are offered by local restaurants and many local arts and crafts vendors provide convenient shopping for the holiday season. www.thecivicassociation.org
Beyond the Vale
Join 2Ghouls Paranormal Events for a fun gathering to discover the parallels between modern ghost hunting & Victorian spiritualism at Alexander Homestead, 14 Sevilla Street. The program explores various types of haunting in theory and in practice while using both modern paranormal investigation equipment and tools favored by Victorians. The two-hour program starts at 7 p.m. Tickets are $20 per person. 904-671-5010
Saturday and Sunday: December 1 & 2
Eco Boat Trips!
Explore the waters of St. Augustine on this 1.5 hour dolphin and nature boat trip. Cruise the Matanzas River in search of beautiful wading birds, dolphins, and more! Learn about the amazing ecosystem that helps support a diverse array of wildlife, making St. Augustine a hit with nature lovers. Tours depart at 10 a.m., noon, 2 p.m. and 4 p.m. from St. Augustine Municipal Marina, 111 Avenida Menendez. Tickets are $35 per passenger.
(904) 377-7245 www.staugustineecotours.com
Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol
A Classic Theater presents this Dickens classic in a way you’ve never seen. Jason Woods portrays every character accompanied by an original score he composed himself! The performance takes place at 7 p.m. Saturday and at 2 p.m. on Sunday at the Pioneer Barn at Old Florida Museum, 259 San Marco Avenue in St. Augustine Tickets are $20 adults and $15 for students. 904-824-8874
Sunday: December 2
44th Annual Garden Club Christmas Tour of Homes
Enjoy the St. Augustine Garden Club’s annual tour that showcases a selection of St. Augustine’s most outstanding private homes. These beautifully decorated historic Florida style homes welcome you to enjoy a taste of nostalgia. You’ll see colorful flower decorations and floral arrangements composed of natural materials, designed and hand crafted by members of The Garden Club of St. Augustine. In addition, your ticket includes a delightful afternoon tea. The tour takes place from noon to 5 p.m. Admission is $20.
www.gardenclubofstaugustine.org.
Supper With The Spirits
Have a plated candlelight supper with spirits from St. Augustine’s Gilded Age. Diamond Lil’ and Ida Alice Flagler make appearances and tell their fascinating St. Augustine stories in this interactive dinner theatre at the Dow Museum of Historic Homes, 149 Cordova Street. The fun begins at 6:30 p.m. and tickets are $59 per person. 904-823-9722 or 905-501-1253
Through The Keyhole Paranormal Event
Join 2Ghouls Paranormal Tours as they re-create Victorian clandestine moments behind closed doors. Let us transport you back in time to learn the bygone taboos of mystic parlor games: Tea-Leaf Reading, Pendulum Dowsing & the Talking Spirit Board. This two-hour program begin at 7 p.m. at Alexander Homestead, 14 Sevilla Street in St. Augustine. Tickets are $25 per person. 904-671-5010
CLICK HERE FOR A COMPLETE LIST OF EVENTS.
NOTE: Do you have a 2013 event that will bring visitors to Florida’s Historic Coast?
email details to: FHCeventlist@gmail.com
Local Resident Specials
NOTE: St. Johns County residents with a valid ID are always admitted free of charge to the Oldest House, the Lightner Museum, the Fountain of Youth (special events excluded), the Ximenez-Fatio House, the Oldest Wooden Schoolhouse, Spanish Military Hospital Museum, and the Historic Tours of Flagler College. The daily tours and wine tastings at the San Sebastian Winery are free to everyone. Also, admission isfree to everyone at the Authentic Old Drug Store, Fort Matanzas National Monument, St. Photios Chapel, the Pena-Peck House, the Father Miguel O’Reilly Museum and the Mission Nombre de Dios Museum (donations are welcomed).
For more information on events and activities in St. Augustine, Ponte Vedra & The Beaches, go to the Visitors and Convention Bureau website at www.FloridasHistoricCoast.com or call 1-800-653-2489
To submit events to be included on the VCB Events calendar and website, please submit details to FHCeventlist@gmail.com.
Source: Visitors and Convention Bureau